Take a deep breath…

Although I still have a lot of work to do and a couple of days left before the deadline, I’m taking a very short break to calm myself. Today is one of the worse (yup, i’m using the comparative form. I’m glad I don’t have to use the superlative form yet) days of my life. I have been doing overtime since 1:00 pm trying to code the lacking features of our program. This is bad. I haven’t been doing this kind of OT since my early years in the office. What made this day worse is that at around mid-afternoon, our housemate I texted us to please go home because the house is flooded (again!) and I couldn’t go to the house to help because we have a 3-figure number of bugs to fix. Yes, as in, 3 figures! @_@ We have to make the program stable somehow before the deadline. Or else.

Okay, I’m taking a deep breath… And to help myself stay sane, I’m going to list down the things that I’m grateful for. Think happy thoughts, as the saying goes. The sarcastic part of me is rolling her eyes and the tired part of me is so ready to walk out of the office and leave all this unfinished work behind. So before I’m going to allow myself to drown in depressing thoughts, I’m writing down the things that I’m grateful for.

1. So far, the recession has not made our company close down. A few sister companies have been forced to close, though. But ours is surviving, so far. I hope our company survives the recession.
2. Because of my work, I’m able to help my family. If my family’s OK, then I should be OK. That’s the most important thing.
3. I’m happy that I was able to save enough money for the downpayment of my laptop…a little dream come true. I don’t get to use my laptop lately because I’m spending around 12 hours doing OT but a laptop is a laptop is a laptop. Actually, it’s not the laptop itself that brings a smile to myself. It’s the surprising fact that I was able to save that amount. I can hardly believe it myself. Now, if only I can pay the rest of the installment… Hmmm…
4. I’m happy that I have housemates who I can get along with. They are more than what a fellow housemate could wish for.
5. I’m happy that I have friends with whom I can talk to, share dreams with… Friends whom I can call in times of emergency and who would offer whatever help they can. Friends whose blogs I can read, friends whom I can chat with in YM whenever I get to use my housemate’s internet connection I hope we will all reach our dreams someday, somehow…
6. I’m grateful for my relatively good health although I haven’t been sleeping and eating well lately. I hope I can do more things for myself once I have organized my life.
7. I’m grateful for God, who never forgets to take care of the clumsy, disorganized, and childish person who is me… even though I forget Him a lot of times.
8. I’m grateful for the wonderful people who, at one point or another in my life, have surprised me with their kindness. I wish someday I will be able to repay them or pay them forward.

Okay, so I may not have the life that I wish. I may not be sitting on the terrace of my own two-storey, Japanese-Zen-inspired house and gazing on the green grass of my wide and neatly-kept lawn, thinking about the earnings of my business; the cool, cutting-edge software invention that I’m working on, or the out-of-town vacation that I will be taking with my family (I wish! we really deserve a vacation…) But so far, I’m okay. My family’s okay. My friends are okay. And right now, that should be enough. And hopefully, we would still be okay tomorrow and for the many, many days to come. And hopefully, I would still be okay after the release date.

Okay, back to work… Ganbarimasu!